DickHats Frequenly Asked Questions
Q: Is this product real? A: Sure is…try it, we guarantee you'll have some fun
Q: What is the story behind Dickhats? A: Find the story here on our blog…
Q: What can I expect in the mail, I don't want a box that says DickHats… A: Don't worry; you'll get a normal brown box package addressed from ANovelT LLC.
Q: What's so special about this chocolate? A: These hats are made of the highest quality premium gourmet dark chocolate imported to America from Belgium . Think of it this way…if Lindt or Ghirardelli were the BMW chocolates, DickHats are made from Callebaut which is the Lamborghini of chocolates. We feel your lady should only enjoy the best of the best! Of course, you could always go the cheap route and strap a Hershey bar to your junk with a rubber band…while awkwardly funny, it won't be as stylish or tasty as a DickHat! ;-)
Q: Are their nuts in your chocolate? A: Only yours…seriously though, this chocolate is produced on equipment that has been exposed to tree nuts, so if you or your lady friend has a nut allergy, then this product probably isn't for you.
Q: Can I get faster shipping? A: Currently no. To keep shipping and handling costs down we only offer two-day shipping.
Q: Can I get slower/cheaper shipping? A: No, due to the perish ability (melting factor) of the product we only ship two-day and send them out on a day where there are three consecutive business days to ensure that they don't melt or get damaged over a longer period.
Q: Do you ship International? A: Sorry not at the moment …currently we are looking for someone to license the product in Canada and overseas in Europe/UK, and Asia . Contact us here if interested.
Q: How do I use a DickHat? A: Doh! You must have missed the instructional video…Apply directly to your dick head.
Q: What if I want to wear it standing up? A: We were hoping you could use your imagination, but since you asked one of our current customers has solved that problem for you…view their response here.
Q: What if the hat is too small? A: DickHats have been specifically designed to fit most “members” of the human race. If you are one of nature's freaks, congratulations on your third leg Mandinga The Wonder Schlong. You can use the following image to measure before buying…please print out on a sheet of paper and cut out the hole. Apply the engorged head of your monstrosity and if you are too big…Then DickHats are not for you. Sorry, we may add a Magnum DickHat in the future. On a positive note, we are starting an Internet escort service called “Big and Bad Escorts…Little Pussies Need Not Apply” send us your name we may have an opening for you.
Q: What if the hat is too big? A: Just tell your lady it's a Chocolate Banana Hammock, tuck your balls in there to fill out the rest of the space and everything will be fine. We're sure you're lady won't care she'll have her mind focused on the chocolate.
Q: Can I get a custom hat? A: Not at this time, although we will be adding more styles in the future as these limited edition styles run out. You are welcome to add your suggestion here.
Q: Why do I have to return the packaging to get the money back guarantee? A: Think of the plastic package the chocolate hat comes in as your proof of purchase. And no, we don't reuse them.
Q: Where do I return the packaging if I hate the chocolate? A: ANovelT LLC - 459 Main Street - Suite 101-205 -- Trussville, AL 35173
Q: Can I feed a DickHat to my pet? A: NO! Dark chocolate is deadly to pets, especially dogs. Even if you aren't a Zoophile, do not allow your pets to eat a DickHat. We are not responsible for your irresponsibility.
Q: Can I buy a bunch for my novelty store? Do you offer a wholesale discount? A: Yes and yes, DickHats have a 500 hat minimum order limit, a MAP agreement, and require a 6- 8 week turnaround production time. Request more details here.
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